Tuesday, July 31, 2007

As the World Falls Down

There's such a sad love
Deep in your eyes.
A kind of pale jewel
Open and closed
Within your eyes.
I'll place the sky
Within your eyes.

There's such a fooled heart
Beatin' so fast
In search of new dreams.
A love that will last
Within your heart.
I'll place the moon
Within your heart.

As the pain sweeps through,
Makes no sense for you.
Every thrill is gone.
Wasn't too much fun at all,
But I'll be there for you-ou-ou
As the world falls down.

Falling down.
Falling in love.

I'll paint you mornings of gold.
I'll spin you Valentine evenings.
Though we're strangers 'til now,
We're choosing the path
Between the stars.
I'll leave my love
Between the stars.

As the world falls down.

*david bowie.

just wanted to share such lovely lyrics.

I am listening to La Valse D'Amelie right now. I highly recommend it.

Don't be surprised

I have grown sooooooooooo bored of it all. I am not kidding. I need excitement to function well. even photography. and that poem? first one since last year. that is how "unexcited" I have become. I need something to bring me to my knees. I have even forgotten what butterflies feel like. odd, yea?

secret? not many understand why I was gone. sigh. but, I am healthy for good. (not sick as in any sort of mind state.) I have been in and out of the hospital. no worries, I am a rebel. :) I can handle anything on my own.

I am back now... I can honestly say that my heart ached being away from my friends. I get very quiet when it comes to being sick and such. now that it is over, I have to repair what has been broken. not sure I have it in me.

not sure I know how.

a few know how I feel and just waited my return.. never underestimating my friendship. grazie. others? they feel rejected, ignored, never knowing how my heart ached. I think for those, the ones that no matter what words I had ever said, felt I had deserted them... I just do not know. my energy is spent. does no one mean what they say anymore? I do. if I have spoken to you about how I feel towards you, know it to be a true feeling. I try to be as good as a friend as I can. no matter where I go or how far I may be, that feeling remains.

I just do not want to feel as if I have done anything wrong. for those who wrote, I left right after thanksgiving, only jumping online at the library when possible. I came back in feb and have not been online at all. not once. my mum did a few things for me, like logging into a few places so my accounts stayed active.

for those who sent birthday wishes, holiday and such to my yahoo account, I am truly sorry--I rarely check that address. I never knew.

yes, I was gone and I never meant to be, but if not that then what? it would always be a feeling of pulling toward me what I need near. should it not already be there warming me? through anything? not just with one person, but a few. I am a friend once and always... I do not quickly change my heart each day. my feet are much more grounded than that.

I truly, truly love you with all I have. all of you. next time I go away, please keep that with you. please do not make me suffer when I return. please do not make me chase you. honestly, I will not. I never felt the urge to chase anyone. moments pass much too quickly, should we not just enjoy them?

sorry for the rant. like I said, in an odd sorts today. hugs.

Losing Gravity

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The Best of You

View this on LiveDigital

I love david grohl. This is my favorite song at the moment; this is the one song that makes me want to stand on a cliff above the sea, and scream the lyrics with him until our voices break. Better yet, he can sing this against my skin.

Hide tides

ok, I am finally back. I must say, I am so far behind with everything. if you have sent me an email, please be patient.

my trip was most satisfying. I must have collected 100lbs of sea glass. not sure what I will do with it. I spent a lot of time beside the sea gathering my thoughts, healing from my sister's death, and shooting images.

I came across some wonderful scenes in Newport, on Goat Island, Sabin's Point, and such. I must confess that I am very disorganized at the moment--my images are all over the place. I also have them on Cds and on another computer that is now in my storage. as time passes, I will gather them and post the scenes that captured my heart.

Congrats to my friend, Patrick Carrington on his new chapbook release, Thirst, winner of Codhill Press’ 2006 Poetry Chapbook Prize. Patrick Carrington teaches creative writing in New Jersey and is the poetry editor for the art and literary journal Mannequin Envy (www.mannequinenvy.com). His poetry has appeared in The Connecticut Review, The Potomac Review, Rattle, The Evansville Review, and many other journals. Rise, Fall, and Acceptance (MSR Publishing, 2006), his first full collection, is available at Main St. Rag's online bookstore (www.mainstreetrag.com).

you can order a copy and see how talented he is here:


I will jump back into my IBPC position and attempt to get The Versifier back up to 500 posts a day. I am also beginning school again soon and changing my work hours to weekend doubles--7am to 11pm on sat & on sun.

on another note, from east to west: bicoastal verse (print edition #1) is out. I am honored to be a part of such a wonderful group.

The print is a lively selection from three years of featured poets at the journal "from east to west: bicoastal verse" including Jack Anders, Coleen Shin, John Sweet, April Ossmann, James Lineberger, Jalina Mhyana, Tara Birch, Terry Lucas, PJ Nights, Tammy Trendle, Valentina Bonnaire, Dorothy D. Mienko, AnnMarie Eldon, Chris Crittenden, Kerri Rochelle, Tasha Klein, Wendy Howe, Jill Chan, Jennifer VanBuren, Craig Kirchner, Jenni Russell, Edward J. O’Brien, Cherilyn Ferroggario, Paul Adrian Mabelis, Gary Lawless, Christine Kiefer, Neil C. Leach, Jr., Graeme Mullen, Sarah Wilson, Ray Sweatman, Tom Blessing, Yolanda Calderon-Horn, and George Wallace. Pj and Ray have done a splendid job. congrats to them.

you can pick up a copy here:


I appreciate the email, well wishes, and just plain happy letters that fill my inbox. it make me very warm to know that what I do can make others smile. to see some of my new work, please go to my Live Digital site. I have only posted a few; I am on wireless as of saturday and my reception likes to go low at certain times. I try to do what I can.

In an odd mood today, really.

* a poem I am working on. it is only in it's 2nd draft. it is not about any certain someone... just a piece. anyway, I am going to have some rice krispies and get some things done. have a wonderful day.

[like a sonata clinging to the skin]

draft II

I dream underwater, where we
are fingertip to fingertip

a calming sea.

I dream in color of black and white,
of photographs, like clouds

pressed into a noon-day sky.
I dream of nightfall, where

a somber breeze warms the air,
where the images

to scattered streetlamps,
exposing this dream,

our bodies, the moon
almost perfectly.


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