Tuesday, May 08, 2012
My Facebook Status Tonight:
"Stefan is spending the night beside his father tonight, he has Alzheimer's and has been given one week to live. I adore being near him, so when at the hospital, I help him in any way that I can--even if it is just smoothing the wrinkles from of his sheets as he sleeps. He is loved by so many and I truly wish he were not ill. For Stefan, I hope that I have the strength to hold him tight enough, so that his heart will not break. ♥"
(Thank you to all that commented, but I deleted it because I prefer it being here.)
I am very good at handling bad things and even handled my older sister's death alone. (At least for a few days until I flew out to her funeral.) I do not know how I do it or even if I do "do it" and do not just turn emotion off and become some sort of robotic figure. Perhaps, I never really take the time to grieve. Odd, because I always take the time to love. No matter who it is, if they move me and make my heart smile, I will let them know. Everyone needs to know when they are cared for. I love to love.
OK, I am getting off the subject. Moving forward (I am sure that I will re-write this many times, so forgive my messiness.)...
We were told today that Stefan's father has about a week to live. His father has Alzheimer's and a very bad fever. He just came home from the hospital after having pneumonia, but a fever has broken out once again. (We were just there a few nights ago.)
I truly enjoy being around him and adore his sense of humor. I am going to miss him.
I recall the first time that I met him; he was so kind and made me feel such a peace within. I told Stefan that visiting with him for those few hours were the best hours I had endured in some time--they were just so relaxing. The conversation was intriguing and has never been forgotten. The second time that I had met him we were knocking for about 15 minutes, but no one had heard us. Stefan and I decided to take a walk around his father's property, stopping by the small man-made lake as Stefan told stories of the past. Again, such a peaceful time. Stefan is my best friend.
When his father finally answered the door, he walked with us, showing us things around the property, talking about his past and how easier it was to move around when he was younger. He told us stories of hunting, good times and gatherings at his home. He told me that he could tell that I was a good person just by the way that I carried myself. That made me feel warm inside.
There are certain people in your life that you simply adore being around and you know that when you talk to them, you are going to smile. He is one of those people. He is a rainbow.
He truly made a mark on my heart-a piece of him will live within me forever. A part of him (his son) will live beside me forever.
Stefan is spending the night beside his bed tonight. I am here writing. We are together at heart.
Perhaps this post is all over the place, but I feel so many different emotions at the moment and it is hard to concentrate with so many things going on in our lives at the moment. All I know is that I have to be strong--strong like I was when my older sister was struck and killed by a truck, strong for my mother, for the family...for Stefan.
I can do that. I will do that.
Babbled by Cher Ferroggiaro at 7:52 PM